Everyone has a collection of overused words that they feelare contributing to the downfall of Western Civilization. One thatbothers me to no end is shaming, because it's typically used todeflect criticism.

We all want to raise children who are proud of who they are anddon't feel limited or insecure because they aren't as talented,attractive, wealthy or popular as their peers. But at some point,we have to acknowledge that everyone has room for improvement.Rather than spoon feed daily aspirations and deflect criticism,hard work and achievement are required to develop pride andself-confidence.

That's why so many millennials lack professionalism. They areunable to self-evaluate because they are inundated with the messagethat assessing one's thoughts, words and actions against meaningfulstandards is shaming.

Bruce Tulgan addresses this issue in my new favorite managementbook, Bridging the Self-Skills Gap. Although his book isgeared toward those who manage millennials, particularly GenerationZ, the shaming trend has spread well beyond the yung'uns, so theselessons can improve the culture of any workplace.

If you always like what you see in the mirror, and reject anynotion of self-improvement as shaming, you're a narcissist. Thatline of thinking stunts learning and growth.

Regular, productive, honest self-evaluation against clearstandards is a fundamental building block for all self-managementskills, which means it's also fundamental for learning all soft andhard skills. Tulgan wisely began soft skills training withself-evaluation and reinforced the development of that skillthroughout his marvelous book.

Where can a manager begin? Tulgan suggested several good,old-fashioned assessment tools like the Myers-Briggs test. Whetheryou direct your employees to complete several tests at once orspread them out over time so they can soak up the results, multipleassessments will provide them with invaluable insight into whatmakes them different.

Generation Z already knows they're special – we've been tellingthem that since day one – but we parents have done a poor job ofexplaining what makes them special. When everyone gets a trophy,nobody excels at anything. It creates a false sense of pride thatcan be easily crushed when faced with actual head-to-headcompetition.

Step two is to teach millennials how to measure their thoughtsand actions within their control against their own potential forperformance. Tulgan detailed six lesson plans that teach the basicsof self-evaluation and how to specifically evaluate skills,motivation, productivity, quality, behavior and key soft skills:Professionalism, critical thinking and followership.

Critical thinking is a soft skill that is in high demand in thefield of journalism. Reporters must access valuable, accurate andoften hard-to-get information. Increasingly, thanks to theproliferation of information readily available on the Internet,critical thinking skills are rusting in reporters of all ages.

There has been a radical change in the prevailing mindset abouthow much information a person needs to keep inside his or her headversus what is accessible through the fingertips, Tulgan wrote.We're all guilty of this. Who memorizes phone numbers anymore? Theability to find multiple competing answers is valuable, but at thesame time, it's at the root of the critical thinking skillsgap.

Critical thinkers also keep an open mind. They don't leap toconclusions, nor do they readily accept what they are told. An openmind and the ability to suspend judgement are two of the mostimportant skills required of a reporter – bias is deadly in ourprofession. When interviewing a source, the best reporters act likethey don't know anything so they can learn everything. Likewise,credit union executives and managers must keep an open mind abouttheir select employee groups and individual members. Assumptionscan kill a credit union, especially in risk management. After all,highly-rated, mortgage-backed securities and taxi medallion loanswere once assumed to be as good as gold.

The Internet has polluted research efforts with poorly sourcedinformation. Sometimes it's flat-out inaccurate. Tulgan devoted alesson plan to research that we'll be using here at CUTimes. Effective research requires one to ask the rightquestions, find good sources, distinguish fact from opinion andcompare facts to determine what is true.

Teaching these skills to employees isn't impossible, but it doestake time and resources. Those resources will be worth theinvestment when your credit union transforms into an efficient shopwith a true sales and service culture, where everyone takes pridein their work.